Telling the Difference Between Growth and Avoidance
There’s a quiet trap hidden in the world of self-improvement—one that likes to wear the mask of progress. It may sound like motivation. It look like discipline. But in reality, it’s just avoidance dressed up in productivity’s clothing.
And, It happens subtly.
Maybe you whack on a podcast while cooking, walking or brushing your teeth. Maybe you’ve got a queue of self-help audiobooks, productivity YouTubers, and newsletters hitting your inbox every morning.
You probably tell yourself you are learning. Like you’re doing something good for you. However, it may be worth considering sometimes your just avoiding reality and using it as a distraction and as a way to avoid actually doing the thing.
The format you choose matters.
I have started to understand that the way I consume information says a lot about why I am consuming it, and I think you should do the same.
Next time you decide you want to learn about something, whether that be mindfullness, productivity or physical health consider how easily the material you’re engaging with slips into your day. If it is so easy, it could just be background noise. So remember, those casual scrolls, that a voice zoning in-and-out of your ear while you’re elsewhere—ask yourself this: Are you actually learning, or are you avoiding?
When information is too easy to absorb, it can stop being something you engage with and start being something you escape into. Audio that plays without demanding your attention. Articles skimmed without reflection. Ideas piling up in your mind, none of them landing deep enough to change anything.
But here’s where things start to shift.
When you slow down—when something forces you to pay attention—you begin to notice what’s actually going in. Not everything, not all at once, but enough to realise: oh, this feels different.
Reading does that. Not scrolling, not skimming. Proper reading. Something about words on a page demands a bit more from you. You have to show up. You can’t half-arse it. You can’t let it wash over you like a podcast playing while you’re answering emails and boiling pasta.
It’s like your brain knows when it’s being asked to participate. And that participation—that moment of effort—is where the good stuff lives.
Here’s a rough rule to work with:
If you can dip in and out of something without noticing… you probably are. If you can “consume” it while doing three other things, chances are it’s not helping you grow—at best, it’s keeping you company. At worst, it’s keeping you stuck.
So here’s something worth trying:
- Pause before you hit play or open that tab.
- Ask yourself: Do I want to learn, or do I just want to feel like I’m doing something useful?
- Choose something that forces you to slow down. A book. A long article. Even silence, if you can handle it.
- And then—actually engage with it. Make a note. Write a line. Sit with the discomfort that comes up when you’re not multitasking.
Not everything has to be deep. Not every moment needs to be a breakthrough. But if you’re filling your brain with constant noise, there’s no space left for your own thoughts to land.
And that’s the point of all this, really.
Not to feel productive.
To feel present.
Because presence is what helps you actually change. And no podcast in the background is going to do that for you.
You have to show up for it. Properly.